
The Colors of Trauma website is a lifestyle blog offering a new lens to trauma and holistic approaches to healing
From the perspective of a black woman, my website permits me to share with the world the contributing factors that play key roles in community retraumatization. I share my traumatic experiences without shame, guilt, or fear.
Please be aware that the series of the stories shared may shock or blow your ears and eyes wide open, while they may resonate with others.
My content goal is not to seek sympathy or for readers to leave comments on what they think is best for me. You see, because I’ve been dealing with traumatic experiences most of my adult life and have been able to navigate the challenges to implement what’s best for me, I wish to inspire those from trauma-embedded communities repeatedly retraumatized to join the healing journey and learn about my integrative wellness system. I also offer educational tips and training for professionals.
Telling it Like It Is
For so many years, way before the Pandemic, I was wearing a mask to hide my traumas. Hurting and ashamed, I would secretly write about my trauma.
When I would try sharing my traumas with some professionals, I found no relief; they lacked any real sense of understanding, compassion, or empathy that I needed. Here’s what I did find: I was being psycho-analyzed as they offered this response, “I hear your frustration.” For me, that had become the kinder way to say “the angry black person” and a way of avoiding the evident issues at hand when sharing the facts that play roles in exacerbating my traumas. Let me be clear on something here. This post is not about race, and I am certainly not a racist. Trust me, I’ve noted that many black professionals have also taken on the “I hear your frustration” phrase.
You see, it didn’t take me long to understand that those kinds of folks that I had been talking to had no real insights into trauma-embedded communities other than what they watched on the news, and for those that lived and/or worked in trauma-embedded communities have adapted to the theory that it’s the old normal that has been accepted as the new normal. I asked myself “What is normal about daily retraumatization?”
Many professionals were afraid of the individuals they were being paid to service in trauma-embedded communities, so, of course, they had never walked my streets, instead, they quickly walked into their office buildings. This reminds me of the time when I had refused to sign off to approve a new round of funding for an organization when I had been a community board member. Let me tell you why I did that. I had asked the director of the organization if she had ever taken community walks in the areas of those participants she services. She responded no, so I asked if there was anything she knew about the areas, and she responded no. Next, I said, “So it would be fair to say that you don’t know what life is like living in none of the areas of the participants you service and you never asked the participants?” She responded “You are right Ms. Evans. I ended with, so why are you requesting an award for a million plus to put services into a community that you know nothing about, in hindsight, the services would be more for your benefit and not the benefit of the community, and for those reasons I will not approve.”
Might I add that I am baffled as to how the organization has been able to meet the quotas to continue receiving funding? She had the balls to say that she “never did any community assessments because the organization is short-staffed and that this community is kind of rough”. My response was with the rounds of funding received your organization should have hired someone who lives in the community and daily deal with retraumatization.
I have since resigned from the community board because I operate from a different belief system. For the record, I don’t run from stuff, I had my reasons and I will just say that I love to help to honestly make a difference in the lives of others and trauma / daily retraumatization is not a joke. If I am adding to community retraumatization – then what would I be? A HYPOCRITE.
The pop question I continue to have is this: (1) how do a professional offer me or those like me healing while we daily deal with being retraumatized?
(2) How can a professional help me or those like me with healing if they believe it’s the norm or they are afraid of me or us?
(3) Or if they have already psycho-analyzed me/them and defined the trauma experiences shared as being frustrated, how can they truly help without stereotyping?
Why won’t they walk the beat in my neighborhood so they can get an up-close-and-personal of the retraumatization I am talking about?
Who is D’Sheene?
I am a strong African Queen who is not afraid to be myself. Some members of my family hate me for accomplishing 2-master degrees among other accomplishments, but here’s my take on that: I am UNAPOLOGETIC for furthering my education.
After settling for a car accident, I chose to invest and launch my company versus buying designer shoes and pocketbooks. Who in the world would be sorry about becoming a boss to themselves? Just saying.
I am UNAPOLOGETIC for co-authoring 3 books and becoming an international best-selling co-author.
https://www.bestsellingauthorsinternational.com/authordsheeneevans
https://www.magcloud.com/browse/issue/1677008
I am UNAPOLOGETIC for identifying a NYC contract worth 6 million dollars and utilizing my skills to help a struggling coach win that contract. This is how I was coined as a Visionarypreneur.
I am UNAPOLOGETIC for being a risk-taker and going after what I want in life and I certainly am UNAPOLOGETIC for my authenticity.
I am UNAPOLOGETIC for mastering and incorporating many of Leoline’s” “my late mother” trauma healing tips and tricks into my integrative wellness system and I am working it just like she had worked it up until she had taken her last breath. My mom was a great fighter of trauma and she taught me how to fight and win, otherwise, I probably would have been in some psych ward by now.
Heads Up: My websites are getting a makeover, but for now, I encourage you to click the links below to learn more about me and my wonderful work.
https://www.zoominfo.com/c/eyes-of-power/407587020
https://robbiesamuels.com/ots-153-the-footprint-to-follow-desheen-l-evans/
https://businessradiox.com/podcast/thoughtleaderradio/eyes-of-power/
https://www.blogtalkradio.com/writenow/2018/07/05/author-desheen-l-evans-on-write-now-radio
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